Monday, December 29, 2008


Well, Bristol Palin has finally given birth. Her son weighted 7 lb 4 oz., and has been named: TRIPP EASTON MITCHELL JOHNSTON. WTF is with all those names??? Anyway, maybe Bristol and the high school drop-out will get married in 2009 - we shall see!! End of newsflash!

What can 2009 hold for me....and the rest of the U.S.???

I created this site, just to get away and have a place to vent. We are not always "open" about our lives, and my other site is established - so it is a different persona. Is that fair? I'm not sure, but there are times, the suffering or emotional roller coaster I am on - becomes too overwhelming.

Financially, I am about to have a meltdown. My house is paid for and my pension JUST pays the monthly bills. If it were not for my son, Christmas would have been a disaster. He helps me out, and I feel like a burden - and I want to crawl into a hole and disappear. If my physical health were better, I would be fine with even a part-time position, but even that is an impossibility right now. I have never worked a job where I did not give a minimum of 100% - I just don't see where I could be employed that didn't involve sitting or standing - both of which I cannot handle. Damnit!! I feel like a horse that needs to be shot and put out of my misery.

My son more or less supplements my income, for food and extras...but this is not his job in life. I have to get my Social Security disability and things should improve, but we know how the government speed...slow!

I am not a very good "resolution" maker/keeper, but this year...I am definitely going to try. First, I definitely want to QUIT smoking. With my past heart history, I should have quit a long time ago...but the Irish/stubborn side of me has not succeeded. Of course, the LOSE WEIGHT issue needs to be addressed as well.

If I tell anyone/someone of my intentions, I will not even have a chance. I have not told my children, as I am going to try my level best at these challenges. Commonly, as soon as say I am going to do "something", and I fail...there are the "I told you Si's" and "loser", only to mention a couple. This challenge is for me and me alone - success or failure to be dealt with BY me. Admittedly, I have absolutely NO willpower, and challenges are quite difficult...but honestly, I will try.

So much for my daily vent...I will return at some time soon, I hope. TTFN.

Saturday, November 22, 2008

I need a life....

Don't get old, whatever you do. Find a way to fight that clock. I have arthritis all through my body, from the top of my head to my toes. Several years ago, I had a bone scan done and that sonofumbeach lit up like a Christmas tree. I am not in severe pain all the time, but I have a very high thresh hold for pain. When the winter months arrive and even damp seasons - I notice the difference.

Hereditary traits like these are a real pain. My oldest daughter has rheumatoid arthritis and it has affected her feet terribly. I feel so bad for her and she is only 38 (as of the 29th of this month).

I babysit my grandson a great deal and wish I could do more active things with him, but physically I just can't anymore.

Eight heart attacks, triple bypass, multiple other surgeries and this body is shot to hell. I had back surgery 29 years ago and everything had been fine until last October when my best friend was dying. I ran home to get some things to help take care of her, and when I ran in the front door - I stepped on the cat and fell very hard. That fall, messed up the surgery of so many years ago. I cannot sit or stand for long, and the pain of getting out of bed in the morning is tough.

I'm just griping here - that's why I created a second blog. A place to selfishly vent. Do I feel better - physically NO, but mentally, probably.

I avoid doctors and tests, as the only health insurance I have is from my husband's union - and it is only 80% major medical. Anesthesiology (when I had bypass) was only paid 25%. I have no prescription, dental, office or eye care. Now doesn't that just suck? I should be on all kinds of meds for my heart - but screw that. The Lipitor was running me $160/month. No way Jose. Talk about falling through the cracks. And I get the run around on getting Social Security Disability. I have applied as a widow also. Normally, I could draw as a widow at 62, but now I just have to play the game to try and get it earlier. Bureaucracy is a blast too.

OK - feel better now...time to get the kid in the bath tub.

Until then..............

Wednesday, November 5, 2008

Back to normal????!!! Maybe not....

My son put a cartoon on his blog this morning - referencing me and how addictive I have become to blogging - as seen on my other site. I have been blogging since Dec. 2005 and basically made cursory once or twice a week entries. But alas, this political season has seen a more rampant posting. But not on this site.

I feel like this kitty in the bowl now - and I have to come out and alive! Just thinking that Thanksgiving is three weeks from tomorrow and then 4 weeks till Christmas makes my heart speed up. I am so not ready for either, and heaven knows, financially Christmas scares me. My paltry pension just does not go far enough. My physical health is not what it used to be, and finding employment that is conducive to each and every problem is tough...Rats, I'll think about that later.

The grandson is keeping me busy with homework assistance right now - so I will try to come up with something for later.

Till then....

Wednesday, October 15, 2008

A weather-changing day...

No sunshine, comfortably warm (74 deg.), rain and cold moving in by this afternoon, early evening. Lovely.

I have a client (new) coming this afternoon, to have her and her husbands 2007 tax returns filed. They haven't filed for quite some time as they are retired - but after talking to her on the phone several months ago - it appears she should probably have filed in prior years. But my task today, is just the one return. Nothing like waiting till the last day of extensions (and to get her stimulus check) to get it prepared.

This is me everyday - what to fix for dinner? (It definitely won't be a baby!) But my grandson is the most picky eater - his mothers fault - and needs to try more and different foods. Give him chicken nuggets and fries and he is a happy camper.

This blog site is still being thought out. I'm not sure where I want to go with it and all that happy shit - still thinking.

Till then...

Monday, October 13, 2008

Therapy has been futile...

I gave up on the physical therapy. For one thing, it really hasn't changed a thing after 3 continuous weeks, when they said I should see some change within a week. Now I am waiting to see how much my "out of pocket" expenses are going to be. I am still fighting with the insurance company - they didn't pay one cent for the ER visit - and that is $200. I just won't pay it - big hairy deal.

The weather is lovely - about 80 degrees and sunny. I saw a long term forecast, and it seems the daily temps will be in the 40's by the end of this month - that does not make me a happy camper.

I wanted so bad to go see Joe Biden tomorrow, but I'm not happy with babysitters available to watch my grandson for a short time. this political quagmire is taking it's toll on my nerves and my life. I am eating, breathing and sleeping POLITICS. It drives my daughter nuts at times - but so be it! Three more weeks and it will all be over. Now, if McCain/Palin happen to pull this out of the proverbial "bag", I will be making plans to move to Canada or Mexico. Having Palin anywhere near Washington politics is such a scary thought!

I have some things to take care of so have a good day!

Till then.....

Saturday, October 11, 2008

I'm Thinking of making this something different!

I am not sure where to go with this yet, but since I have been so political on my regular site...this may be just a getaway for me. Or I could also put some political points on here too - why not? What's to stop me? I'm over 21 and not afraid!

I do more than my share of the cleaning, as a matter of fact I think I do 98% of all the tedious jobs around here. Begging and beseeching to get help doesn't seem to work - that's for sure.

When I first saw this picture, I kept thinking of Slyght (theson) and when he was in Ireland - his biggest thrill was the Guinness factory - must be the Irish side of the genes he got from me. that is not to insinuate that he looks anything lie a squirrel. That would be very mean and cruel - he is more like a....nah! no clue!

I am going to try and jazz this site a little - see what happens. I shall return!