Saturday, November 22, 2008

I need a life....

Don't get old, whatever you do. Find a way to fight that clock. I have arthritis all through my body, from the top of my head to my toes. Several years ago, I had a bone scan done and that sonofumbeach lit up like a Christmas tree. I am not in severe pain all the time, but I have a very high thresh hold for pain. When the winter months arrive and even damp seasons - I notice the difference.

Hereditary traits like these are a real pain. My oldest daughter has rheumatoid arthritis and it has affected her feet terribly. I feel so bad for her and she is only 38 (as of the 29th of this month).

I babysit my grandson a great deal and wish I could do more active things with him, but physically I just can't anymore.

Eight heart attacks, triple bypass, multiple other surgeries and this body is shot to hell. I had back surgery 29 years ago and everything had been fine until last October when my best friend was dying. I ran home to get some things to help take care of her, and when I ran in the front door - I stepped on the cat and fell very hard. That fall, messed up the surgery of so many years ago. I cannot sit or stand for long, and the pain of getting out of bed in the morning is tough.

I'm just griping here - that's why I created a second blog. A place to selfishly vent. Do I feel better - physically NO, but mentally, probably.

I avoid doctors and tests, as the only health insurance I have is from my husband's union - and it is only 80% major medical. Anesthesiology (when I had bypass) was only paid 25%. I have no prescription, dental, office or eye care. Now doesn't that just suck? I should be on all kinds of meds for my heart - but screw that. The Lipitor was running me $160/month. No way Jose. Talk about falling through the cracks. And I get the run around on getting Social Security Disability. I have applied as a widow also. Normally, I could draw as a widow at 62, but now I just have to play the game to try and get it earlier. Bureaucracy is a blast too.

OK - feel better now...time to get the kid in the bath tub.

Until then..............

1 comment:

Utah Savage said...

I feel your pain darling. Though I am disabled and get social security disability payments, It's not enought to live on. Pays about what your hubs union insurance does, about 80%. But once you get to be 65 you'll be eligible for medicare part D, the RX benefit. Only good thing Bush did. I'm so low income I'm eligible for some things like tax relief on my property taxes. I have chronic sciatica. I ruined my lower back working on the creation of the little house and back entrance, the stone work, all the plantings, all the trench digging. Too much strain on the lower back. One of my best friends has fibromyalgia. Another has MS. Odd that of the three of us, I'm the serious cigarette smoker and the healthiest. With the exception of my lower back, all my serious problems are genetic. I was always thin, but have always had hight blood pressure and really high cholesterol, so I'm on a double dose of Lovestatin. Still it's high. Oh how long can I bitch and moan? I'll bet we could have quite a good time venting. I'm so sour now I have to go to the shrink, have an assessment to see if my bipolar drugs need to be tinkered with.

Was that good for you? It was good for me.up